That they may teach the younger women to be sober, to love their husbands…
[Tuesdays in Titus 2]
Attributes of a godly woman (2)
Love Their Husbands
There will be times when our husbands act unlovable. Shocked? If you’ve been married for any length of time, probably not.
When I was about sixteen years old, my mother sat me down for a talk. Of all the things she said I remember this part clearly.“Tasha, there is one thing I can tell you about your husband, right now, before we have any idea who he is. He is a sinner. And trust me, that is a good thing. Because you are too.”
We are all fallen. All in need of a Savior. Don’t be shocked and surprised when your husband disappoints you. Don’t be shocked and surprised when you disappoint your husband. If we were perfect, then Jesus wouldn’t have needed to come to save us.
How then, do we love our imperfect husbands?
The same way we love anyone.
Love is defined right in the Bible. I Corinthians 13.
Patient. Am I showing patience to my husband?
Kind. Am I being kind to my husband?
Does Not Envy. Am I supporting him without desiring praise/honor for myself?
Does Not Boast. Am I willing to not speak of myself?
Is Not Proud. Am I willing to humbly submit to him?
Is Not Rude. Am I watching my tongue and actions?
Is Not Self-Seeking. Am I choosing my husband over myself?
Is Not Easily-Angered. Am I willing to be wronged without retaliating?
Keeps No Record of Wrongs. Am I holding things against my husband?
Protects. Am I protecting him with my words and actions?
Trusts. Am I trusting that his heart is right?
Hopes. Am I keeping myself hopeful for our marriage?
Perseveres. Am I willing to keep on keeping on?
If you’re anything like me then you probably cringed at a few of those questions. Willing to be wronged without retaliation? Supporting him without wishing for someone to notice me and what I did?
We press on toward the goal to win the prize… (Philippians 3:14)
Cheryl, another older woman in my life, once said, “It doesn’t matter what you look like, it’s how you respond.”
This was in the context of your physical relationship with your husband (also part of loving him!) But I believe it is true in every other aspect as well. You can disagree with your husband and still show him love if you respond correctly.
Go to your husband and ask him what the top 10 things are that he likes you to do for him. They might surprise you! My husband’s included things like visiting him at work and keeping bread in the house. A handy list to have around to make sure that you’re showing love in ways that he understands.